SENSUAL MEMORIES
by NikZkinE
Summary: FIVE YEARS OF UNREQUITED LOVE, SEVEN SELFLESS ONE. FUJI TRIES TO DISTANCE HIMSELF FROM TEZUKA THOUGH THEIR FEELINGS ARE THE SAME WHAT DOES THE LATER SAY ABOUT THIS. R & R PLS. NEED POINTERS IF I SUCK AT WRITING LEMON. DEBUT LEMON HERE PEOPLE... PWP MM SLASH


**SENSUAL MEMORIES**

**HAHAHAHAHAHA… OKAY THIS IS MY FIRST LEMON ATTEMPT HERE IN FF… AND IF MY SCENES ARE NOT SATISFYING THEN I AM BEGGING I REPEAT BEGGING FOR ANYONE WHO HAS A GOOD HEART TO GIVE POINTERS ON HOW TO RIGHT IT MORE SENSUAL AND INVITING… PLEASE TELL ME HOW YOU THINK OF IT… THANKS…**

**DISCLAIMER: I DON'T OWN PRINCE OF TENNIS MANGA NOR ANIME OR ANYTHING AFFILIATED WITH IT…**

"Shusuke are you sure about this? You know how mom and dad find a way to just go off somewhere you don't need to go with them!" Yumiko my sister says as she paces around the living room with arms crossed.

I sighed exhausted at her worrying when she's worried she's two times more worried than two parents and that means having four parents while worrying about two childish ones. "Sister, I know you're worried but this is not the first time I'll be studying abroad and besides mom and dad are gonna be there-"

I was cut by her saying. "And that's as good as not having any guardians at all!" he screamed at my face as she exaggerated her point by throwing her arms in the air as she backs up from me. "I could almost imagine what would happen if they were to be your sole guardian there, Shusuke! They are a married retired couple with no care on what you do seeing as you're already turning eighteen and that's just the start of it!" she said as she slumped on the couch beside me.

I laughed a little at her antics and she returned it with a glare and an 'I'm not kidding' look. "You worry too much for your age sis and besides I haven't even decided on going, true that their tennis program is respectable but their photography studio isn't well kept and that's what I want in a university both having good photography equipment as well in tennis." I smiled at my sister with one of my rarely seen genuine smile.

She sighed as she lounged and used my lap as a pillow then looked at me with a worry smile. "If you decided to go, then just take care of yourself. And keep an eye on those two." She said as she stood and headed towards the kitchen. "Anything you want for dinner?"

I paused and think for a bit then said. "Yakiniku." I peeked at the kitchen and ended up laughing at the slipping of one plate in the kitchen.

"Shusuke, you know we can't have that! We don't have a damn griller!" she said as she spun around and glared at me.

I giggled a little then turned towards the front door saying. "Then I'll go borrow from Iwanaki-san from next door." I heard a sigh followed by a 'fine whatever'

It was one week before graduation and we were given the week off of our classes and managed to relax but that week off was only for classes we still need to go to school for practicing the graduation march.

I looked at my notebook that I had made all my classmates and batch mates write on and smiled. They all wrote a good one to three sentences farewells with different drawings and doodles on the side. I giggled a little at the farewells of some unknown fans that I actually have surprised to know that there was actually a fan club.

I smiled to myself satisfied that my remembrance notebook turned out to be better than expected, now to make the tennis team write their farewells in the last page. I stood up and walked towards the conference room that ended up being our clubroom when there was rain.

I arrived at the front of the door finding it ajar and couldn't help but hear the conversation inside. "Tezuka, a university in Germany offered a fully paid scholarship for you to attend their school, their expecting a reply from you until next week. What is your answer?"

The room was silent for a good three minutes now and I was getting a leg cramp from standing outside so I let myself in after three knocks then greeted them with my usual smile. "I'm surprised to see that this room is void of Echizen and Momo getting at each other's throat about food or tennis grit." I said as I leaned on a row desk. "So, where are the others?"

"Inui's in the chemistry lab, Oishi and Eiji are busy with the farewell party with Momo, Echizen and Kaido as helpers. And Taka's at the rooftop if you're looking for him." Ryuzaki-sensei said as the emotions varied from being disgusted at the mention of the chemistry club to almost sad fondness at the mention of the party.

"Thank you Ryuzaki-sensei." Then I went and gone to go to the roof.

When I arrived, Taka was there standing in a corner with his back towards me. "Hey." I said as I walked towards him and leaned on the fence then eyed the sky. "Have you told her yet?" he shook his head then looked down at his feet then I sighed. "This is your last chance Taka-san. She's going overseas to study music, you should tell her soon."

"B-But what if she doesn't like me? W-what if she doesn't see me that way? W-what if I get r-"

"Rejected? Then if that happens then she's not the one for you." I said as I shrug the slightest. "But hey if she doesn't like you then why did she came to all the games you played in and how can you explain the towel incident?" I said as I giggled when he blushed.

"B-But-"

"But nothing, if you don't tell her now then you'll just miss your chance and end up looking like a coward." I said as I looked up in the sky.

"You're right Fuji! I'll go and tell her now! Thank you so much Fuji!" he said as he clasped my hands then dashed off towards the door.

"Some adviser I am, not following my own advice." I said to myself knowing full well that no one can hear me.

"What advice?" someone said as I was looking at the sky. I looked at the intruder and saw it was Tezuka then mentally sighed.

"A love advice, he was in love with this girl ever since in our first year and well he needed some push." I said as I turned and looked at the ground from the rooftop seeing how people seems like ants from that height. "And I was pretty much the same; I've been in love with this person you see, for almost five years already. I fell in love with that person when I first saw him but that person didn't even saw me. He's graduating this year too I guess I'm not gonna see him again seeing as he's going abroad to study." I said as I leaned on the fence again.

"He?" he said as he looked at me with an eyebrow perfectly arched in a confused manner making confused still look good.

I chuckled lightly at my inner thought then said. "Yes, I've been in love with a guy for five years, ever since elementary. But seeing as he was more occupied with other things I guess I just have to lock these feelings up and put it in a box that can be opened occasionally and be admired. But other than that I can't do anything."

"Why don't you tell him?" he said as he leaned on the fence beside me. I shook my head then looked up in the sky.

I smiled as I saw the setting of the sun changed the color of the sky. "No, I'll just make him confused and might affect his decisions. I'll just stand aside and watch seeing as that was all I've done for the last five years."

"I see; have you managed all your papers in entering the high school division?" he said as he kept his gaze onwards.

"I don't need to; I'm going abroad to study." I said as I continue to eye the sky and kept my smile in place careful to not let a single crack break even more.

"Abroad?" he said as he looked at me as if what I said was the secret inside Pandora's Box.

"Yes" I said as I looked at him with the usual smile in its place. "I was offered a scholarship in a university where my mother and father will be staying at for the next four years. And I was planning on staying behind after high school and continuing on taking up my college degree there." I said as I looked at the people down at the ground.

"Then that means you get to see that person you were talking about." He said as eyed the small people as well.

"No." I said as I turn around and headed for the door. "He's going somewhere far away from where I'm going; somewhere where I can't reach without wanting to." I said still walking towards the door.

It was the evening before graduation and the night of the farewell party of Seigaku Tennis Club. The party was pretty lame considering as Oishi was the instigator but seeing as Eiji was his assistant the party came out as decent with slightly humorous games and program.

The time reads as exactly ten minutes passed ten and everyone was drunk because of Momo and Echizen's prank on spiking the punch bowl leaving only me, Inui, and Tezuka on their right minds.

I chuckled lightly at the sight of Echizen kissing Sakuno right on the lips seeing as someone spiked his ponta. I shifted my gaze and saw Inui holding a cup filled with rainbow colored liquid and handed it over to Kaido saying it was coffee and having said Kaido pass out from a single sip. I snickered when my eyes fell on Momo clad only in his boxers and was dancing on the coffee table while singing jingle bells seeing as Taka-san forced a pitcher load of punch down his throat when someone gave him his racquet. I shifted my gaze a bit and saw Eiji fast asleep on the couch while Oishi was screaming at the wall being an idiot standing in his way.

I was laughing when my eye caught Taka-san found comfort in hugging Tezuka before passing out cold on the floor. I peeked through my eyes and saw Tezuka scowling at me with his arms crossed giving off his 'this is ridiculous' look and sat in the corner of the couch that wasn't occupied by Eiji's foot and then said. "This will be bothersome to clean up tomorrow morning."

I chuckled a little before proceeding on breaking up Echizen and Sakuno and carrying Sakuno up to my sister's room and letting her sleep with her along with her friend Tomo. When I arrived at the living room I saw that everyone was asleep somewhere on the floor while Eiji on the couch beside Tezuka who was the only one awake.

"I assume you want a comfortable bed?" I was answered with a nod followed by him standing up.

I went upstairs with Tezuka following behind and stopped at the front of my room then turned to look at Tezuka. "Here we are you can sleep in my bed I'll go sleep in Yuuta's room since he doesn't use it that much now that he's in the dorms." I said as I opened the door and let him inside then turned to my dresser and pulled out some clothes for sleeping in. "I'll go now and may I remind you, don't touch a thing in my room its private." I went out of my room shutting the door behind me and went over to Yuuta's room and got changed then turned in for bed.

**TEZUKA'S POV**

He shut the door as he left his room with a pair of nightshirt and pants with a last reminder of not touching his things in his room noting their importance. I pushed the thought aside and settled myself on the bed and pushed the covers aside to slip inside.

I lay my head on the pillow and decided to take a goodnight's rest for graduation day tomorrow. However as I lay my head on the supposedly comfortable tool I found my head colliding softly with what seems to be a book underneath the pillow.

I reached under the pillow and took out the offensive object and held it in line with my eye. I sat up to take a better look at it by putting my eyeglass on. I looked at the book which is seemingly plain with no title or author written on the cover.

I opened the book curious as to what was the book about. I opened it to reveal a blank first page with no publishing date or any copyright sign. I flipped open another page to see a number written on the lower left corner saying '2' in kanji.

I flipped open another page and came across a small paragraph with a date on the top alongside with its page. I read the paragraph and paused as I realized that it was Fuji's Journal.

_July 17, 20XX_

_ I just got used to my new school and am currently adjusting with the new club I entered. I entered Tennis in this school seeing as they don't have a decent studio here for a photography being a normal elementary school. Today was a bore for me, not only were we thought of things I already know inside the classroom we were also thought the same thing in Tennis. The couch was nice and all telling us that with a little practice we may be as good as him when we grow up._

_We spend the whole two hours after classes learning things that I already picked up from just watching Tennis in T.V. in short I was bored. We were sent home at about seven minutes passed five in the afternoon. I was walking passed by a tennis court when I saw a child the same age as me practicing walling in one of the courts wall. I approached the child and watched him as he continues to hit the ball exactly at the same spot of where he last hit. The boy stopped and catches the ball with his racquet then he turned to get his water bottle from the bench that was near him and drank its contents._

_I walked home with thoughts on who was that young man that was practicing at the courts all alone. I arrived at twenty minutes passed six and was given an earful from my sister. The lecture fall into deaf ears when my thoughts float back to the boy that I saw on the courts and realized that what I felt was no ordinary fascination. I'm a genius and a lot of people can vouch for that so I know in myself what I feel. I admire him so I guess this is my first crush._

I couldn't bring myself to continue and invade Fuji's privacy but curiosity got the better of me and so I read on. Flipping a couple more pages to see if that boy has been the one that took Fuji's heart without him realizing it.

_July 21, 20XX_

_ I continue to see him practice afterschool as I did for the past year. And for that passed year he never noticed me nor even bothers to look at me as if I was invisible to him and all that he cared about was practicing. He never stopped when another player joined him in practicing or even bothers on giving them a glance when they leave. I was fascinated at this boy so much so that I felt as though I was turning to be a stalker. I find it amusing that I accused myself as a stalker when all I do is watch him play tennis for a little while before heading home._

_ Today, is my first day in my sixth year in elementary and I was bored to talk about pointless things with people who actually says it was interesting. But then again I have to socialize, I smile at them when they talk and I comment back just to be polite and felt as if I was just acting like a good friend but in reality I'm not. _

_ The teacher came in and all students shuffled to get to their desired seats. The teacher greeted us like usual then paused and announced a new transfer to our class and his name was Kunimitsu Tezuka, the boy who I've been admiring for a full year now._

I paused as I read my name written perfectly in Fuji's neat handwriting and stopped to look over it over and over again. I do remember about Fuji mentioning once that we attended the same school back in grade school but I never thought that we were ever in the same class. I shook my head and think back to the phrase after my name _'the boy who I've been admiring for a full year now.' _I felt my insides knot in an unexplainable feeling creeping up my spine and then I realized; the one that Fuji said that he was in love with is me?

I calmed myself and continued to read the rest of the entry to try and shed some light on my suspicions.

_He was quiet, not much of a talker and was often alone. Sometimes I hear other kids calling him names like ice cube by the boys while ice prince by the girls. I sometimes humor myself thinking how polar different the names were given to him by the two different sexes._

_ Before the classes were over I willed myself to try and talk to him after school. But what I saw stilled me from where I was standing at. I saw him there standing in front of the Sakura tree in front of the school with a girl kissing him. From that angle I couldn't see where she was kissing him but the thought of the word kiss made my foot move passed them without giving a glance back and headed home. I feel stupid writing this now that I've calmed down but I couldn't move from that spot and my not wanting to see his lips pressed on another I ran._

At that moment I was sure that I felt my face heated up at what I read, I was sure that if this was written in a letter addressed to me it would've fallen right in the confession letter category. I willed myself to close the book and to stop invading Fuji's privacy even more. But I find myself unable to resist when I saw a photo in between the pages and so I flipped it and read its contents.

_August 3, 20XX_

_ It's been two and a half months since entrance ceremony in junior high and since I became friends with Tezuka and I must say he isn't that much of an ice prince like they say, you just have to know how to do read his very well chosen words. It was morning and we were cleaning the courts when suddenly it rained. We went inside to change clothes because of the sudden shower. I finished changing and sat on the clubroom's bench and eyed my fellow teammates and was glued to Tezuka changing his shirt oh so painfully slow. And right then I realized, not only was I in love with Tezuka I am also feeling a physical attraction with him too._

_ I stilled myself and avoided my gaze to something else until my phone rang and caught my attention right in cue. I answered the call that was from Yumi saying she'll be staying over for a while and after the conversation I put the receiver down._

All the other words that came after that single name was a blur to me; then I started to think of thoughts on who was this Yumi. I was already expecting the worst case scenario and was trying to fool myself into thinking that she's nothing but a friend. And at that time I smack myself hard thinking that I was actually attracted to Fuji that way; that was why I was hesitant on taking the scholarship and why I was so shock about Fuji's plans on going abroad. It was decided I am in love with Fuji.

**NORMAL POV**

I woke in the morning to find myself painfully in contact with the floor having my face planted flat on the floor while having my lower half of the body still in bed. I groaned and sat up slowly trying my best not to have all my body slams down hard on the floor. I heard my phone rang that made me lose balance having my face yet again crash painfully to the cold hard floor.

I glared at the small device having all intention on throwing it against the wall but decided against it seeing as I just got my mom to buy me another one since I smashed the last one against the wall and stood to sit on the bed. I sighed and pick the damnable thing up not bothering on looking at the caller I.D. and answered it vehemently. "Hello? Who could have been calling me at such an ungodly hour I must say I am very displeased on your timing."

"Well, well, well, I guess you're still the same as ever huh Shu-chan." The voice said from the other line.

"Yumi, what the hell are you doing calling me at four in the fucking morning!" I screamed at the receiver while successfully sliding down the sheets and coming in contact once again with the floor. "Damn it!" I screamed at the floor while standing up and rubbing circles around my abused behind.

I heard running footsteps coming towards my room and stood to appear at least decent for one that just woken up but failed miserably when I slipped on the sheet that fell earlier and fell down having the sheet float down on my head. The door opened and I peeked through the sheet to see my sister with a scowling face and Tezuka who's behind her looking groggy from lack of sleep. I smiled sheepishly at my sister while trying to stand up but slipped yet again this time on the pants that I discarded last night while sleeping. I growled at the offensive thing and stood up successfully ripping the thing off in two and smiled satisfactory then turned to look at my sister and asked. "What is it sister? Is something wrong that you would go rushing in here?" I said with my usual smile.

She sighed then turned for the door but looked back slightly and said. "I thought that it was Yuuta that fell but seeing as it was just your usual morning struggle across your room then I was immediately uninterested." She said as she was about to go but turned around and looked at me again this time from head to toe then said shrugging. "And Shu-chan you come down when you finished changing out of your _shirt_ and put on something for your bottom half as well." She added then went on her way towards the stairs.

I looked at myself and saw that all I was wearing was my oversized tee shirt that I bought last Christmas and my briefs, and yes I don't wear boxers I hate those stuffy things. I sighed as I went over to Yuuta's closet and took out a pair of gray slacks that were a bit too lose on the waist and was threatening to fall beyond my hips. I sighed and decided on wearing it than not wearing anything at all and pulled off my shirt and took a white tee shirt that Yuuta detested me for buying such a fit thing. I took the shirt by arm and lay it on bed then pulled my oversized shirt over my head but paused when I realize that I was not alone in the room and came eye to eye with Tezuka who's eyes despite being small grew wide at that time.

I continued to change as if he wasn't watching and fixed the bed then took my laundry and went passed him with my usual mask smile securely in place and went towards the bathroom to put my laundry in the shoot. When I arrived at the bathroom I shut the door closed and locked it then threw the clothes on the basket quite harshly then went straight for the sink and splashed water on my face trying to will down the blush that was painfully painted red on my cheeks. I shook my head one time too many trying to calm myself but nothing seems to be working. I decided to think about his leaving and studying in Germany; well that work a bit too much that it brought a tear on the corner of my eye.

I was busy staring at myself in the mirror when suddenly the bathroom door opened revealing a shocked Tezuka. I looked at him with my face bare of any masks with tears sliding down my eyes. I quickly turn to face the mirror and splashed some more water in my face then took the towel and wiped my face dry. When I finished wiping off the water I turned for the door towards Tezuka with the mask securely in place and said. "Were you gonna use the bathroom? Go ahead I'm done." I said as I was side by side him in front of the door. I passed him and was out of the bathroom then said not bothering to look back. "Oh and Tezuka, could you knock first before coming in it may become a bad habit when you continue to do this." And then I was off towards the kitchen making a mental note to have that stupid bathroom's lock fixed later that day.

When I went over to the living room I found that everyone was still in the same position as yesterday with the difference of having a blanket draped over them mainly the work of my sister. I smiled at the sight of all the members being present and all together for the last time. I felt my heart clench at the thought, for the last time, kind of sad actually. My heart feels heavy and I feel suffocated with the tears and sobs threatening to escape my mouth. I placed my hand on my mouth and stormed out of the house without any destination in particular.

I stopped running when I felt my heart in my throat and leaned on my knees while trying so hard to even my breathing. I looked around me and found that I ran all the way to the old park I used to see Tezuka practice years ago. I entered the park and sat on the bench that was used by Tezuka in my memory and smiled sadly as I looked up in the sky. "Only a few more hours Shusuke, just a few more moments don't let your mask brake now, you've endured far more pain that this, hold on till the end." I said to myself as I let tears flow down quietly on my cheeks.

"Shusuke?" a voice said in the direction of where I came from. I slowly diverted my gaze to the person and saw Yumi with a worried expression on her face.

"Yumi." I said coldly as I let my entire mask slip off and continue to cry.

"Shusuke." She said carefully as she approached me and slowly took me in her arms and slowly caressed my head. I sobbed lightly at the touch and felt the caress grew tenderer until she was comforting me like a child and then I brake and cried. "Yeah just cry, I know how much it hurts, I know, just cry." I clutched onto her back and cried and wailed and let myself go because I can only do so in front of her.

"Everyone, this is my friend, Yumi. She's older than me by five years and is an early old lady give your greetings guys." I said in jest to the team and was smacked right side on the back of the head for such a comment.

"Being happily married doesn't mean that I'm already an old lady bitching about youth!" she screamed at me and I just laughed heartily while she cleared her throat and introduced herself. "Hello everyone, I'm Yumi, self proclaim first love of Shusuke and is his cry shoulder also best friend and future bridesmaid if possible, childhood friend of Shusuke." She said as she smiled while I scowl the slightest and turned my head to the side.

"Even Fuji scowls huh…" said Inui as he scribbled something on his notebook.

"Nyaaa! I'm Fuji's Best friend! Self proclaimed though." Eiji said although he whispered the last part.

"Heeeeh~ Fuji-sempai's first love huh…" Echizen teased from the corner.

"Hehehehe even Fuji-sempai had a shot in love huh…" Momoshiro with Kaido chimed from behind Echizen then scowled at each other then bickered.

"Oh, I'm Oishi the vice captain of the team and these are…" Oishi gestured towards the guys but was cut short by Yumi.

"Yes I know Fuji always talks about you guys and how much fun it was coming to Seigaku. Oh by the way Shu-chan, aren't you supposed to be leaving for London later today?" She said as she smiled at me like another annoying big sister.

"Too much info Yumi, shut up and besides I'm no####" I was cut and glared at her from the corner of my eye while still maintaining my smile when she said.

"Hohohoho, how come you use that kind of tone with me Shu-chan? But never mind that now, we need to get you ready for graduation and your flight!" she said as she whirled around in excitement.

"But I'm not lea####..." I was cut by Yumi putting a hand in my mouth and muffling the words I intended to say.

"Ohohohohohoho! Let us go now!" she said as she pulled me upstairs.

I reluctantly let myself be dragged upstairs to my room. When in front of my room the door was harshly opened and we went in leaving a loud bang of the door. I sighed as I flopped down on the floor when Yumi oh so gently set me down. "Well? What's up? Why the hell did you tell them that I'd be leaving today when I haven't decided on going or not." I looked suspiciously at Yumi which in turn just smiled sadly at me and hugged me.

"Why do you think? Hmmm, Shu-chan." She said as she caressed my head lightly and hugged me tighter.

I felt tears well up in my eyes and clutched onto the material of her blouse on her back and sobbed lightly. "Shinichi's gonna kill me, stop hugging me already, I'm not a kid anymore."

She let go of me and patted my head then grinned wide. "Alright time to do my job!" she exclaimed as she went over to my closet and browsed my wardrobe and then pulled out several garments then laid it on the bed.

"You're not planning to… no way don't… i-it's just a graduation, n-no need for your help… Yumi?" she looked at me with a very creepy grin then all of a sudden…

**TEZUKA'S POV**

"STOP! PLEASE I'M BEGGING YOU! PLEASE I'D GIVE YOU ANYTHING JUST STOP! PLEASE YUMI!" a loud whine, or should I say a scream came from upstairs that sounded very close to Fuji's voice.

"Nya, that was Fuji-chan right?" Eiji said as he whirled around in our winter uniform.

"Interesting…" Inui said as he scribbled something on his notebook yet again.

"Come on, let's just go already you look fabulous Shu-chan, come on!" a voice said coming from the stairs and gradually coming louder and louder.

"I told you we don't need to wear such a thing! We were told to dress in our uniform!" Fuji said from behind the Yumi.

"Whatever… come on" she said as she pushed Fuji in front of us.

I had my usual face on seeing as it is hard making a small emotion come out since I was raised like that but internally I was having a war between rationality and impulse on what I should do. Should I think it through and control myself or should I just jump him there and then and the others be dammed? And without warning Fuji made the decision for me when he said. "No one would be happy to see me like this besides the girls and you! Besides I've no use for this later today since I'm going…"

He was cut when the door flew opened and revealed a man wearing a suit with a wide smile on his face. "Shu-chan! Oh my you look fabulous! Your mother will be extatic!" he said as he hugged Fuji.

"F-father? What are you still doing here I thought that your flight was earlier this morning?" Fuji said as he looked at his father with a confused expression.

"Oh, yeah it was in the morning but your mother wanted to see your graduation that's why we decided to put it off oh and she called Yumi two days ago to fix you up." He said smiling.

"You called her out just to do this? She was in Hollywood doing her job and you called her out for this? Are you sure you're not gonna get in trouble Yumi?" Fuji screamed at his father. _ I never saw him like this before._

"Yup, besides the filming ended last night and since I have a very talented assistant, I think it ended up fine." She was saying when her phone rang.

"Hello? Ah director… oh… what? Re-shooting! Why? My assistant didn't show up s-sorry yes, I'll make it by today, yes sorry I'll do my best to arrive earlier, yes, yes, of course." She hung up then sighed and looked at Shusuke then said. "Sorry Shu-chan, I won't be able to go to your graduation, but I'll send you flowers in London when you arrived there."

"Its fine just go already, you'll be scolded right? And thanks, for everything." Fuji said then smiled.

"Yeah, do your best this is the last day so make it count." She said in a language I don't understand but I figure it must be French; then Fuji nodded.

After the whole preparation of the team we all went and ride on Fuji's father's car which was a van. We arrived at school far too early for the ceremony so we waited in the courtyard of the school scattered about and was making small idle chat with each other.

**NORMAL POV**

I sighed for the tenth time that morning for many reasons. I looked at Tezuka from the corner of my eye and find it hard to breathe. I stood up suddenly with the excuse of going to buy some drinks and went to find a vending machine.

As I stared at the machine I felt ill to the stomach and find it unbearable and went running for the bathroom. I threw up all the food that I ate that morning and then cleaned myself up in the sink. "Pathetic, to think that I'm this weak; just by the thought alone of you leaving make me weak on the knees I could hardly stand. All my faced is coming off one by one…" I sighed once more as I looked at the mirror. "I feel so scared to have all my emotions go flowing out of control. Yumi where are you? I need you…" I said as I collapsed on the floor.

I was staring off to space when suddenly the door of the bathroom flew open and revealed an out of breath Tezuka. "So here you are, come the ceremony's starting we need to go back." _Ah that' right the ceremony, of course what else could be the reason Tezuka would have to be searching for me. _ I sighed as I slowly stood up carefully sliding the façade once more.

"Thanks, I was a bit nervous so I went for a little breather, sorry about that let's go." I said as I by passed him and was out of the door when all of a sudden he grabbed me by the arm and whirled me around till I was facing him.

"Don't you have anything to say to me, Fuji?" he asked carefully as he looked at me blankly.

"I don't believe I have anything to say…" _liar! You have you have damn it! Just say it just a small sentence say it! I screamed at myself but no sound came out._

"Alright, but I do." He said as he pushed me against the bathroom door which was closed and locked when I heard a small click when I was pushed against it. "I won't be letting you out of my sight not even for a second; so you just have to rip those tickets to shreds Fuji because I'm not letting you leave."

"What are you doing Tezuka? I don't understand, w-we have to get going the ceremony." I was struggling lightly trying my best to shrug him off without making it seem that I was struggling. "Tezuka?" I asked as I carefully slid his arm slowly off of my arm but was surprised when the hold tightened even more.

"You're not going anywhere Fuji, at least not until I see you rip that plane ticket and passport into tiny bits. You're staying here in Japan. Right here with me." He said as he gripped on both my arms and then said. "I'm not going to let you go now that I realized what I want to have for all my life; Fuji, I love you, don't leave me behind, please." He said as he hugged me close.

I was stunned at first but recovered quickly then looked at him confused on his actions and words. "What are you talking about? You're going to Germany and me to England, that's the plan. You have your whole future ahead of you Tezuka! What the hell happened for you to be saying things like thi…" at that time my phone rang so I answered it without looking at the caller I.D. "Hello? Saeki? What is it calling me at this, ahhh! What the hell? Tezuka!" I screamed as he took the phone from my hand and slammed it shut.

"Why does he have your number?" he asked with voice flat but I could see the anger in his eyes as he stared at me with animosity in his eyes.

I step backwards trying to place some distance between us then said. "What does it matter? It's no big deal, we're childhood friends of course he has my number." I said as I side step a little to change our positions and hopefully I could get to the door.

"It's a big deal, to me. It's unusual for him to suddenly contact you just because you saw each other again, that's not how friendship works Fuji, normally you'd keep in touch with your friend not cut all communications and then suddenly getting interested just because you each other again." He said as he did a side step making me back up, reading my next move.

"Tezuka what has gotten into you? What made you think and act like this?" I screamed as I grabbed him by the collar.

He looked at me and smiled a rare small smile. "I saw a book compilation of love letters in your room."

I released him from my hold and staggered back. "Y-you read my Journal? I-I thought that I've thrown that away."

"Oh? Are you getting old Fuji? Forgetting something important like that, it's like you planned it all, me reading your Journal, and you acting like a tease in your house." He said as I looked up and saw Tezuka smirking, the Tezuka smirking.

"P-planned, Tease? Do you know that the only time I was never a tease were those moments you guys were in my house, all throughout the three years I was giving so obvious hints that even Inui offered to help me once when we were sophomores!" I paused feeling the tears form in my eye and the sob threatening to escape my lips. "Are you saying that if not handed out to you, you won't take it? Is that it? This is what I hate about you; you're so thickheaded it hurts. I don't want to be hurt like this over and over Tezuka. I've suffered enough for three years; I'm tired of being a martyr. I don't want to be the one always waiting, I'm tired Tezuka; tired of always waiting for you to give me even a single glance." I collapsed on the floor with tears running down my cheeks and sobs I try so hard to bit back.

"Fuji, I…" he paused and crouched in front of me and stayed like that and said. "I didn't know, I never knew, and you're probably right that I am so thickheaded that I hurt people around me, and so… forgive me… I don't have much words to say, and I thought that with my actions people would understand, that's why I thought you understood…" he said as he lifted my chin up to look up at him. "The stares, the small brushes, I thought I told all my feelings in them, I just realized my feelings so… I can't actually readily tell you everything I'm feeling… just by telling you all this that is still not my point is painfully embarrassing for me… so I'll just cut it short to explain everything, I love you Fuji, for all this time, I've been aware of you all you did I'd know, like how you look at the sky admiring it when sunset; I knew it all and I guess, no matter how much they call me smart, I'm pretty slow aren't I?" he said as he slowly pulled me into a hug. "I'm sorry and I love you, Fuji…"

"Shusuke…" I almost whispered against his ear. "Are you addressing me, my sister, Yuuta, mom, or dad?" I said smiling a little. "My name's Shusuke." I said as I stood up and offered my hand to him as I pulled him up. "Nice to meet you, Kunimitsu…" I said as I smiled for the first time, in a carefree way in front of someone other than my family. "Let's get along, hmm?" I said as I shook his hand that I was still holding.

"Ah." He said in his usual monotone voice with only one difference, he was smiling; a very soft and sweet smile.

"Um, Mitsu, as much as I really like to hold hands and gaze at each other all day, you do realize that we're in a bathroom in school in our graduation day don't you." I said as I regained my usual attitude.

"So?" he said as he held my hand tighter and pulled me in an embrace. "It's not like we won't get our diploma." He said as he caressed my head while playing with my hair.

"You might not care about going up the stage and taking the diploma but I do, cause I get a chance to see your baby pictures." I said as I got out of his arms and went for the door pulling him along with me.

"Nya! Where's Fujiko? It's his and Tezuka's turn!" Eiji whispered annoyed to his seatmate.

"And now for the title of Valedictorian, may I call upon Fuji Shusuke and Tezuka Kunimitsu." Said the principal.

"Nya! This is not good! Where are they?" he panicked and started to thump his foot on the floor.

"Here!" I said as I got up from behind Eiji and winked at him while walking towards the stage.

"Here." Tezuka said calmly as he steadily went up the stairs and up the stage.

We looked at each other and smiled then he took the microphone and delivered his speech and I did the same. We went down the stage and proceeded with the rest of the ceremony.

_March 14, 2XXX_

_Smiling back at the memory of almost seven years ago, I can't help but think it's all just a dream. The pre-graduation party, the encounter Tezuka and I had inside the men's bathroom, the after graduation party, and the wonderful confession Tezuka made that night, I'll never forget those times._

_Now I sat here in front of my computer reminiscing old times. I kind of recalled what happened all those years ago when I saw Tezuka on T.V. on his and Echizen's final match at the International tennis competition in Germany. All this years I've never met any of the members ever again well maybe because I don't put in the effort of wanting to see them including Tezuka._

_Maybe, I think, this is for the best. Distancing myself as to not make Tezuka take the wrong path and to protect him from being a deviant. I find it funny being in-love with someone for a long time can change a person's point of view and sometimes do the most selfless deeds. Is that what you call as a martyr? Haha I'm tired maybe I should sleep for tonight though it's still early, I'm feeling a bit of the jetlag I have from flying from New York to Germany, I guess, its just stress. I better get some sleep. Goodnight…_

I shut my laptop down and headed for bed when I heard shouting from outside my hotel room. Curious I went over to the door to see what the commotion was about but feeling the sudden movement of the room I figured it would be best to go to bed instead of poking into someone else's business.

Once again I made my way over to the bed but stopped when I heard the shout once again only this time louder and clearer in native German. "Sir you can't just barge in here like this we have a policy of protecting our clients' privacy so please if you want to see one of our guests then contact them exclusively sir." One of the attendants of the hotel said while trying to push back the intruder.

It seems he was dealing with a stalker or maybe someone who's desperate to meet someone in this floor. I felt myself sigh as my curiosity won over my dizziness due to lack of sleep and opened the door enough for half my body to be seen outside of the door. I was about to look over at the events when suddenly the intruder said in a calm yet irritated voice. "That's why I'm here, I've been contacting them for days now but they still drive around in circles and in the end they'd always hung up with me not having a single word with the person I want to talk to. Now tell me, where is Shusuke Fuji's room?"

I stared at the man wide eyed to see that it was actually Tezuka I was about to shut the door closed when he saw me and rushed over successfully putting his foot between the door and the doorframe preventing it from being shut closed. "Shusuke…" he started that made my stomach flip in anxiety. "Please, let's talk." He said as he slowly opened the door and stepped into the room shutting the door with a light click and advancing to face me.

"You need to leave…" I said carefully, hiding my expression by my long hair and stared at the side avoiding his gaze before I do anything irrational.

"Shusuke…" he said softly as he took another step forward and reached his hand to caress my cheek. I flinched at the touch and took a step back and shook my head lightly as a warning. "Why'd you leave?" he asked as he continues to advance his steps towards me while I took a step back for every step he makes.

"Stop…" I said as I looked him in the eye with little control I mustered to do so. "Don't do anything stupid Tezuka; I beg you let it go… let me go…" I said as I felt tears threatening to fall anytime now. "I can't drag you down from everything you have dreamed of… I can't take you into a world of sin and carnal desire… I can't let you be tainted…" I said as I felt hot tears flowing down my cheeks. "I just can't Mitsu, I can't…" I whispered as I looked at him in the eyes.

His eyes became hard and there was something there, hurt, love, desire, and so much more I can't describe. He looked at me and started. "You don't want to taint me? Do you think I'm that pure of a person Shusuke? I'm not that pure and I can be the worst person you have met because, I…" he paused and clicked his tongue then continued. "For the years that you weren't there, for the times I need comfort and to sate my desires, I go around searching for someone with hazel brown hair and striking blue eyes, thinking it was you." He paused yet again and clenched his jaw along with his hands but continued. "Every time I see on T.V. on a magazine, in the newspaper with someone standing beside you, I feel the desire to kill that person making me lose control and throw a fit. When I see you smiling at others, and laughing with them I feel torn. If only I could keep you in a cage and lock you there so no one could lay their eyes on you I would. For the seven years I couldn't hear your voice saying my name I felt almost insane and playing tennis is the only thing that kept me from losing my reason. Shusuke, the more you run away from me the more I lose my mind. I don't know if this is obsession or monopolizing you but all I know is that I love you too much to let you go. I'm not like you Shusuke, I don't want the one I love to be so far away from me, I can't take it. So please could you please…" he whispered the last words as he leaned in and embraced me. "Can you stay with me please, I don't care what the world thinks I don't care if people look at me with disgust in their eyes, I don't care as long as the world knows I love you…" he paused and looked at me in the eyes. "Do you love me?"

I choked on air as he asked those words. I felt my tears flowing uncontrollable from my eyes. I clutched on his shirt and buried my face on his chest and said. "I do, so much so that I would give you anything and that includes you're future. I couldn't dare and say the words 'stay with me, choose me instead of your dreams' I couldn't say that because I know how you love tennis." I said as I felt the arms around my waist tightened its hold.

"But do you know how much I love you? You said you would give anything to me… then why didn't you give yourself to me? Why didn't you give everything that you are to me?" he said as his other hand gripped at my hair loosely and buried his face onto my hair. "Why didn't you realize that I love you too much…?" he said as he pushed me harshly away and kissed me with bruising force.

The kiss slowly turned mellow but passionate. He licked my lips lightly asking for entrance. I could feel his lips trembling as he asked for permission as if asking in a mantra, 'let me love you, please let me stay' I smiled and parted my lips slightly only to lose breath when he shoved his tongue inside my mouth and explored everything I could offer.

The kiss lasted long until we both needed air to breathe but he didn't stop on planting wet kisses on my lips as he fumbled with me shirt loosening the buttons. The shirt was thrown in a corner with a harsh his from the fabric and Tezuka proceeded to unbuckle my belt. I grinned mischievously into the kiss thinking that even though Tezuka may have had previous affairs he didn't know how to enjoy a sensual foreplay.

I swatted his hand away from my waist earning a surprised look from him breaking the kiss. I smirked at his insecurity and looped my arms around his neck and pulled him in for a kiss this time with me dominating. I slid my hands down his chest purposely brushing against his nipple and grinding my leg onto his groin at the same time.

I broke the kiss and looked at him in the eye with lust and desire evident in mine and said. "No need to rush, we have all the time in the world, and Mitsu, I love you… if you don't want me to leave then I'll glue myself to you, be prepared…" I said as I whispered huskily into his ear earning a growl from his lips and a tight squeeze in the ass.

He pushed me onto the bed and hovered above me leaving a trail of kisses down my chest. I moaned at the sensation and bucked my hips upward to get more friction. I heard him hiss and grabbed my belt once more. I slapped his hands once again and sat up while leaning my body onto my arms and cocking my head to the side all the while smirking at him.

"I said we don't need to rush, let's do a little foreplay shall we, Mitsu…" I said as I whispered his name seductively against his ear.

He growled and captures my lips in a deep kiss and said voice hoarse and hasty. "If you wouldn't be such a hot tease then I wouldn't be losing control now do I."

I smiled into the kiss and switched our position making Tezuka on the bed and me hovering over him. I kissed him lightly and stood walking away from the bed making him raise his eyebrow. I reached into my bag and pulled out a tube of lube and tossed it to Tezuka then fumbled around and took something that made Tezuka's eyebrow rise once again. "This is to control you since you said you can't hold back from my teasing.

I walked back into the bed and crawled oh so slowly towards Tezuka making him gulped visibly. I smirked at the sight and proceeded to straddle him and sat on his groin intentionally earning a hiss from his lips. I leaned forward and licked his lips as I tie the leather belt on both his hands and pulling it above his head and securing it into the headboard making him growl. "I don't like this Shusuke, untie me." He said as he struggles on breaking free.

"No use in struggling Mitsu, those are specially made leather straps for BDSM purposes, you do know what BDSM is right?" I said as I leaned forward and whispered into his ear and nibbled it. "Mitsu you should've known this from way back when we were in Seigaku, I'm a sadist and I'm go~od at it." I said as I rocked my hips downward onto Tezuka's groin earning a throaty moan from him making my smirk grew wider.

I pulled off from him and kneeled onto the bed still straddling him showing him full view of what's about to happen. I smirked down at him and unbuttoned his shirt very slowly, unbuttoning one button at a time while grinding my hips on his groin.

Once the shirt was off leaving Tezuka panting and practically humping me, I leaned down and kissed him on the lips. I proceeded on leaving a trail of kisses down his neck and leaving obvious marks on places that are hard to see but acts as a repellant for annoying pests who wants to have a taste. I hovered over his chest and licked his nipple earning a sigh from Tezuka. I chuckled at the reaction, I guess he never knew that the nipple of a man can be very sensitive too.

I gazed darkly at the nipple before biting down lightly earning a shocked gasp from Tezuka followed by his statement. "What was that for?" he screamed as he struggle lightly.

I leaned upwards and placed a chaste kiss on his lips before whispering against his lips. "Shhhh… hush Mitsu, trust me, it'll soon feel good…"

I leaned down again and capture the nipple in my lips and gave it a good suck making Tezuka squirm. I smirked and licked it slowly the rubbed circles around it making Tezuka gasp loudly of pure pleasure. "I told so~" I said as I made the same ministration on the other before pulling away leaving a panting Tezuka with an evident blush on his face.

I chuckled at the sight and kneeled in front of him unbuckling his belt and sliding down his pants all the way off his legs and stared hungrily at the evident bulge on Tezuka's boxers. I grinned as I dove down until I was in eye level with the throbbing member and give it a light but lo~ng lick up towards Tezuka's abdomen making him buck his hips upward making contact with my chest. "Like that…?" I said as I looked up at Tezuka who was scowling.

"Stop teasing me Shusuke hurry up!" he said impatiently that made me chuckle. I leaned upward and kissed him deeply before breaking the kiss and licking his lips then smirking against them.

"We're just half way there Mitsu, come on be patient…" I said as I pulled back and went down again until I was facing Tezuka's member once more. I tugged at the material lightly making Tezuka hiss and gracing a sadistic smile on my face. I cupped the throbbing erection and started pumping up and down making Tezuka's breath come out in pants and gasps.

I continued the ministrations until I felt him coming close cease all actions making Tezuka growl at the lack of friction. I pulled down the boxers confining Tezuka's cock earning a relieved sigh from Tezuka. I pushed the material off of his legs and settling my head between his legs earning a statement from Tezuka that was forgotten when I took him whole into my mouth easily fighting down my gag reflex and deep throat-ing Tezuka.

I sucked and twirled my tongue around Tezuka while bobbing my head up and down earning erratic movements from the brunet. When I felt him coming close I prepared myself and swallowed all he offered and leaned upwards and kissed Tezuka, cum still in my mouth and made him gulped it down. "Tasty?" I said as I licked my lips off of some of his essence still on my lips.

He looked at me through clouded eyes and said in a weak but heavy voice laced with lust. "You are awfully sadistic making me swallow my own cum." He said as he catches his breath.

I smiled at him widely before standing up and taking a tool in my bag. I went back to the bed finding that Tezuka had calmed down and so is his member and grinned mischievously at the sight. I took the fist and showed it to Tezuka then said. "Do you know what this is Mitsu?"

He looked at the device and gave me an incredulous look then said. "What are you planning with a capsule vibrator?"

I smiled at the question and leaned forward whispering huskily into his ear. "You'll find out soon enough…" I pulled off of him and discarded my pants along with my briefs and kneeled in front of him with all my glory and smirked at how he gulped and how his cock hardened at the sight. "Like what you see? Aren't I hot for eye candy… ne Mitsu…" I said as I slowly rocked my hips forward and back earning a stifled growl from Tezuka.

I continued to kneel and grabbed the tube of lube from the side of the bed and squirted a generous amount onto my hand and threw the tube to the side for later use. I placed the lube around my cock and started pumping giving Tezuka an all out exposed masturbating show. I continued to pump slowly as I can bare and stealing glances at Tezuka who was licking his lips. I suddenly felt my throat dry as I bit back a throaty moan and rocked my hips in tune with my pumping and then suddenly stopped earning a very low whine from Tezuka.

I smirked at the reaction inflating my ego all the more. I looked down at Tezuka my vision hazed as I grabbed the lube and pour a more onto my hand and tossed it to the side again. I sat comfortably on Tezuka's abdomen lifting my hips up a little as to not let all my weight lean on Tezuka. I reached in the middle of my legs making Tezuka quirked an eyebrow not knowing what I'll do next as I just almost come earlier on and touching myself there again would just make me cum. I chuckled at his reaction and reached further from my cock and massaged circle patterns around my hole and slowly pushed a finger inside and moaning aloud.

"Shit…" Tezuka muttered as he tried to take the leather straps off his wrists. I smirked at his futile attempt and pumped the finger in and out slowly as my reason would let me and slipped another finger in and proceeded into making scissoring motions. "Damn it Shusuke get these things off!" Tezuka protested as he desperately struggle against the belts.

"Temper, Temper Mitsu, I'm not done yet…" I said as I slipped in another finger hissing at the intrusion but proceeded to pump in and out. I moaned at the sensation and slowly picked up the pace as I rocked my hips in a rhythm with my thrust. I moaned loudly as I hit my prostrate sending chills up my spine and making my back arc in pleasure.

"Shusuke…" Tezuka warned as he scowled at me making me smirk even more. I leaned up towards him and kissed him deeply feeling all his impatience into the kiss I pulled back grinning.

"Fine I'll let you have it then…" I said as he sighed relieved and waited for me to take the belts of but frowned when I didn't make a move. "Ready?" I said as I positioned his cock in front of my entrance earning a glare from him that died down when I slammed down on his cock suddenly making him groan and threw his head back into the pillow.

"Shu-suke, get these off… now…" he said as he tried with all his might to start thrusting but can't because of my weight on him and with me pushing his hips down as so couldn't move. He was about to say something again when I pulled all the way leaving the head of his cock inside and slamming back down. "Argh… Shusu- ah!" he managed when I thrust again this time harder.

"Mmmmm…" I moaned as I slowly thrust in and out of him earning growls, moans, and groans as I do so. He has his eye shut as he grew impatient and tried to speed up the thrust but couldn't do so. I smirked evilly and leaned in and licked his neck then looked at him all the while smirking. "Alright, you can do it…" I said as I unbuckled the belts and threw them on the floor with a loud 'clink' and blinked when I was suddenly under him and his hands pinning my arms on the bed. I smirked at him and said slowly and seductively. "Payback time? Enjoy…" I managed when he pulled all the way up to the head and slammed back in hitting my prostrate dead on.

I screamed at the contact and felt my breath grew erratic and came out in pants. I moan each time he thrust in hitting that spot over and over again making my head spin and all thoughts abandoned. "Ah! Mhmmmn… ha- ah… ahn wah… Mitsu! Hah- f-faster… ugh.. ah-! More! Ah-y—yeah… Yeee~s more! Ah! Harder! Um!...: I screamed out as he thrust in without mercy hitting over and over again that sweet spot inside me. It scared me at how accurate he can be but relish the thought when I came all over both our stomach.

I panted trying to catch my breath but couldn't do so as he flipped me over and pulled me to an embrace with him still inside me and us kneeling on the bed. I was about to say something when all of a sudden he pulled out and thrusts in over and over again with ferocious force and dead on accuracy making me light headed and think of nothing but the sensations I'm feeling. And all reasons out of reach as I felt myself coming to my peak once again. I moaned loudly as I collapsed on the bed supporting my weight with my elbows and trying to prop myself up but stopped short when he grabbed both cheeks of my ass and started thrusting in and out again. I felt my head whirl as my vision became blurry and all I can hear is the slapping of naked skin to naked skin and the pants and groans that are long forgotten who they belong to. I felt myself tightened as I feel the need to come again and did so collapsing onto the bed too exhausted to register Tezuka pulling me up and whirling me around to face him while he continues on kneeling and supporting his weight on his knees and toes and he sat onto his heels and pulled me onto him and started thrusting once more.

I felt myself getting hard once again as he mercilessly thrusts in and out of me making my body writhe at the sensation. I screamed his name over and over losing count as I do so and just let my body go and let Tezuka do as he pleases. He pushed me onto the bed and pulled my right leg onto his shoulder while I was lying on my side and he continued to thrust. "M-mitsu! Ah-! I- I'm coming! Ah! Mitsu!" I screamed out as I came again unable to remember what time it was. I felt myself tightened and gripped tightly around Tezuka hearing him groan and came inside me before collapsing on the bed beside me.

I sighed contently as I felt his arms wrapped around my waist and pulled me close until his head rested onto my shoulder. He sighed contently as he reached for the covers and pulled them over us shielding us from the cold. I chuckled lightly which made him hum as I said. "Next time remind me never to tease you too much ever again." I said as I turned to face him and snuggled my head onto his chest and sighed.

"It depends, if I ever remember to remind you…" he said as he pulled me close with his arms around my waist. I smiled content and happy that finally after five years of unrequited love, and seven years of suffering selfless love, I finally had the courage to selfishly love the one that took my heart unintentionally when he first swung his racquet in that tennis park.


End file.
